introduction H2

It is certain that every family couple goes through some times when they have a conflict, it can be a simple conflict that resolves itself or one that needs to be discussed formally and find a solution, it can also be a conflict of fingers. 

leave and need someone else to intervene or cause the family to break up.

Experts and social science experts talk a lot about family conflicts and the ways they think they can be resolved, one of the methods we use in this essay is from an article published by Ada Nuno in the Spanish-language magazine El Confidential.

If the family conflict is not fully resolved by the couple, it creates psychological stress, and its recurrence can destroy the health of both people, and it often causes both or one of them to suffer from incurable diseases, with many studies medical evidence that there is a strong link between family conflict and diseases such as heart disease and leaky gut syndrome.

The interesting thing that many people misunderstand is that a couple who does not have a conflict means that they have a good relationship and a high level of understanding. Dr. Mark Burg, an expert in mental health, said, “The fact that there is no conflict in the family does not mean that it is good for their health, but it means that one of the two people does not have enough confidence in himself to express his opinion. say or know about it, so it is not a good practice for health”

Family conflict resolution

Most of the time when the couple wants to discuss finding a solution to their conflict, another issue arises that each of them goes back to events that happened in the past and upset them, which experts say makes the solution even further away.

Dr. Burg said that there are two ways to resolve the conflict, choosing between them according to the personality and character of the man or woman; Either you try to fight fiercely until you finally win, or you let the conflict go on forever, and you try to turn a blind eye to the things that you disagree with or that make you angry, neither way will end the problem. And it’s not good for the health or longevity of the relationship.

Every time there is a conflict between the couple, it is important that each of them study and define what it is and the true nature of the conflict as well as the causes. Then he starts to solve it together with his partner.

In 2011, the Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy published the results of a study that shows that couples who are used to finding solutions to their differences through cooperation and cooperation, to live a more comfortable family life.

Learn how to apologize

Some people falsely believe that it is not right for two people who love each other to please each other. Asking forgiveness from your twin is definitely the best way to heal the conflict. But on the other hand, it is important that the person giving the apology does not understand or want that the apology will heal the whole conflict, when he says the word ‘I’m sorry’ and ends the whole problem. Psychologists say that one of the most problematic issues between couples is that one of them immediately apologizes for his mistake, without trying to understand the reason for this mistake in the first place or the reason for the anger, and then He wants that word to be the medicine for all that was. It is important to look for the cause of the problem and then think about its solution, and apology is the key to that.

Research done in 2013, it was found that if a person feels that he has received a proper apology from his twin for his mistake, it will make it easier for him to quickly and easily overcome the anger and sadness of the wrong done to him.

This does not mean that one of the two people should constantly put the blame on him, wanting a solution to be reached, but that the person should take his true responsibility, so that this becomes part of the search for a solution. The experts also say that this step is not mandatory for a person to take as soon as the mistake is made, because it happens that the person who is given the apology immediately assumes that it is an intention that does not come from the heart, so It is important that when there is a conflict, each of the two people take their own time to ask themselves what happened and how it can be treated, and then come together to find a solution together. Then the experts said that it is more likely that the person who is being apologized will accept the apology quickly.

Do not lock the door!

Newly married couples often have external sources of psychological support, such as family and friends, so conflicts are resolved more quickly and may be less stressful and heartbreaking than those who do not. someone else to go with their disagreements or family time that is difficult for someone else to intervene.

The experts also recommended that it is good to have a third party to find a solution to the dispute, especially when it is a big dispute. They said that a third perspective outside of the two of them could lead them to understand the reality of their differences. It is especially good for the third party to be someone who is suspected of having experience and skill in the field of communication.

Be careful what you say

Each partner should be careful about the words he says when there is a conflict. For example, he should avoid divisive and controversial statements. The best way is to end the conversation quickly and everyone takes time to think about what happened and how it can be resolved. At the same time, he understands his mistake and the mistake of the other person. After that, they start talking about finding a solution to their conflict by seeking a rational discussion and avoiding noise and anger.

The experts believe that the dialogue that resolves the conflict is the one where the two people stop blaming each other and that each one wants the other to confess or take the blame for what happened. It is appropriate for the person to dwell on his feelings of goodwill and how this incident hurts his feelings, so that the other person understands the harm that the offense may cause in the future of their relationship.

For example, if one of the two people did not pick up the other’s phone and then resolve the anger and conflict, it is better that instead of one of them not picking up the phone, the person would repeatedly take the blame for what happened and the crime. that he could not pick up the phone, it is better to talk about his feelings caused by picking up the phone at that time. “I feel desolate and desolate when you’re so bustling not noting my telephone” is superior to saying, “For what reason are you so bustling each time you don’t answer my telephone?!” The first makes the individual profound and sorry for the hurt he has caused you, so he will rapidly begin saying ‘sorry’ But the latter statement creates a feeling of self-defense in the person, seeing that it is believed that he has not done any other work.

It is also a good idea for the couple to first agree not to discuss any disagreements that arise until time has passed and each has calmed down. This means that when anger intervenes, each one controls himself, knowing that he will be discussed and satisfied. During the waiting period, the anger will subside and each may be ashamed of the futility of what they held.